Resource roundup: Help parents cope with pandemic uncertainty

Schools will open this fall, but the pandemic is still here — along with the mask and vaccine debate, fatigue, mistrust, fear, uncertainty and possibly chaos as we tackle the next challenge: the Delta variant.

Although most restrictions have been lifted — for now — and we are returning to “normal,” it is still a difficult time. Consider helping your parents navigate the current pandemic messages, warnings and rules by including coping tips in your back-to-school materials. Add some helpful, positive messages to your school newsletter, principal’s back-to-school message, parent hand-outs, social media posts and website messages. 

Get started with these recommendations from Chris Moore, Social-Emotional Learning & Behavioral Health Coordinator for Salem-Keizer Public Schools, Ore.

Go easy on yourself

If there’s one thing families should keep in mind, it’s this: Go easy on yourself! Forget being perfect. None of us is perfect, especially during a global health crisis.

Strengthen your emotional skills. The pandemic forced us back to basics, so focus on relationship-building and self-compassion. Growth and learning start with social and emotional strength. For example, if you’re struggling as a parent, it’s OK for your kids to see that, but let them see how you navigate it in appropriate ways rather than just having an outburst. They’re getting life lessons on managing a crisis. That means they’re getting tools to be resilient. When you feel like you want to scream, breathe. Then breathe some more, Moore said. Give yourself time to calm your brain; go from raw emotions to reasoning. 

Practices he suggests to boost resilience and capacity:
•	Get on a regular sleep cycle.
•	Move your body daily.
•	Connect with people who care about you.
•	Take scheduled breaks from screen time.
•	Get outside.
•	Try a free, evidence-based self-care app, such as the SuperBetter website (www.superbetter.com/) or the Mindshift CBT or MindDoc apps.
•	Ask for help and let people help you. You’re not alone.
•	Offer the same kindness to yourself that you would to someone you care about.
•	Be mindful and accepting of how you're feeling in the moment without judgment.
•	Recognize our shared humanity and the reality that sometimes being human is just really hard.

More practical suggestions on talking to kids, based on ages: 
The simple advice is: Be firm. Be kind. Be flexible. Find specific tips in this list of guidelines for parent-child communications from the Child Development Institute. https://childdevelopmentinfo.com/how-to-be-a-parent/communication/#gs.7ovlax

Some of the basic principles of good parent-child communication include:

•	Show interest and offer help.
•	Turn off the TV, avoid calls when your child wants to talk.
•	Keep conversations private and avoid embarrassing your child in front of others. 
•	Physically get down to your child’s level to talk. 
•	If you are angry about a behavior, regain your cool before you communicate so you can be objective.
•	Listen carefully and don’t interrupt. Be courteous. Down ever put your child down with name-calling or insults. 
•	For specific incidents, if you have knowledge of a situation, confront your child with the information you know about. 
•	Show your child that you accept them, regardless of what they have done. 

Recommended resources for more information

Books for adults:
•	"Thrivers" by Michele Borba
•	"The Whole Brain Child" by Dan Siegel & Tina Bryson
•	"Brainstorm" by Dan Siegel
•	"How to Talk so Kids Will Listen (& Listen so Kids Will Talk)  by Faber & Mazlish
•	"Anxious Kids, Anxious Parents" by Wilson & Lyons​

Books for kids:
•	"What to Do When You Worry Too Much — A Kid's Guide to Overcoming Anxiety" by Dawn Huebner
•	"Ruby Finds a Worry" by Tom Percival
•	"Change Your Brain, Change Your Life (Before 25)" by Jesse Payne

Websites:
•	Child Mind Institute: https://childmind.org/
•	Greater Good Magazine: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/
•	Anxiety Canada: www.anxietycanada.com/articles/parent-child/

Free Apps:
•	MindShift CBT: www.anxietycanada.com/resources/mindshift-cbt/
•	SuperBetter: www.superbetter.com/
•	MyLife: https://my.life/
•	Stop, Breathe & Think Kids: Focus, Calm & Sleep: www.commonsensemedia.org/app-reviews/stop-breathe-think-kids-focus-calm-sleep
•	MoodMission:https://moodmission.com/
•	Happify: https://my.happiifylcom/
Contributed by Shannon Priem, APR, former communications director for Oregon School Boards Association; internal communications specialist for Salem Health and board chair for EAGLE Charter School in Salem, Ore.